people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Randomize
