Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
