The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
