He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize