Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
