and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
