spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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