it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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