For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Randomize
