Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
How external is "for external use only"?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Randomize