I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
