went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
