Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize