Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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