Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
