wrigley field is MILF paradise
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
