he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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