Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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