Don't make out with my wife yet
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
