i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Found your dick twin last night
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
