Don't make out with my wife yet
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
