Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
This house was built for laser tag.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
