I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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