Duck Duck Cougar?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
