We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
