Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
