My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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