I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
