....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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