so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
