"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Oh god it's open bar.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
