Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Randomize