He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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