just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
