i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize