Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize