how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize