It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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