and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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