Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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