girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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