so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
