So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
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