She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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