are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
