I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize