bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
did i just pee glitter
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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