Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
