Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Randomize
