He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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